Finding Home

So I am sitting at my dining room table with tears pouring down my face.  This has become a typical post-Labor Day ritual for me as it has always meant that the school year is back in session and my time prancing between Boston and Cape Cod has come to an end.  This year the space left in my heart – previously filled with sunny days on the beach and endless laughter with my family – is particularly sweet as for the first time in 20 years, I spent the entire summer in Truro while I launched my new business.  What a gift to be able to embark on this new journey surrounded by people I love and who support me unconditionally.  And on that note, please indulge me for a moment as I express my infinite gratitude for:

My sister Heather, who I emailed at the end of June and informed that she would be taking ALL of my Pilates classes over the summer as I was a nervous wreck.  And she did just that, sometimes enduring the same exact routine twice on the same day.

My mom, (okay, now I am really crying), who embraced my teachings – of both body and spirit – and opened her mind to all that is possible, because so much is possible.

The “Aunties” for becoming my Tuesday night regulars and for telling everyone in town to join them for Pilates.  Oh, and at the end of every class telling everyone how great it was (insert smiley face).  And my cousin Stephie who drove down from Yarmouth every Tuesday morning!

The residents of “Bugville” – my sister Lena, brother-in-law Bobby, and my nephews Brady, Merrick, and Beckett.  You all took me in and endured my endless running of the blender, ate my often questionable meals, watched me throw kettle bells around the front lawn, listened to me complain about how cold I was in the AC, and dealt with me constantly draining the coffee pot.  But all joking aside, you filled my spirit with love and laughter and buoyed me through this significant transition in my life.

And to my husband Fran, who encouraged me every step of the way, who agreed to spend most of the summer alone while I was on the Cape, and who is the reason I had the courage to “Get Lively”.

Thank you for that, and now back to my point.  Today I was walking along the Charles River and thinking about how much I love my life here and how excited I am to be in this new business, but how do I reconcile the feeling that I also belong somewhere else?  Then Van Morrison’s “Into the Mystic” came on…

Smell the sea and feel the sky

Let your soul and spirit fly into the mystic

And when that fog horn blows I will be coming home…

And I want to rock your gypsy soul

I’ve always thought of a gypsy as having no home or roots, but today I realized that for me, a gypsy has a soul that anchors in more than one place.  So I wiped my tears, and decided that rather than feeling torn between these two places, I will instead give my gypsy soul the freedom to float between the various homes of my heart.  And when that fog horn blows, you know where I’ll be…

(Photo Credit: Megan O’Leary)


  1. Heather

    This summer was an awakening and changing period for all of us ….and I may have been supporting you in your new life…but at the same time you were making a huge difference in mine!!!!! Love you so much and I know you are going to have great, great success because you just “get it” and have the ability to help others “get it” too!!!!

  2. I don’t think you could have come to a better conclusion. The pressure/tendency to singularize/silo/stack ourselves into one package is quite amazing when what we really are is multiplicitious–simultaneously. Of course you can float between/among, because you/all of us are between/among–always! Thanks for the much needed reminder.

  3. Arianna

    Love this! I feel your pain; it’s always hard for me to leave Cape in the summer too. I am VERY envious that you got to spend the whole summer there. However, I am glad you are back so I may take advantage of your expertise, and hopefully become your guinea pig soon!

  4. Mom

    Okay, I’ve wiped my tears. I am so grateful for the time you were here and especially for the things you taught me and continue to teach me. Some days I get in the “zone” and it feels great! You are a FABULOUS coach!!! Love you!!! xoxoxo

  5. Lorita

    How wonderful…. you have transitioned to a place of peace and joy with your decision. I am so excited for you and proud of you. thank you for sharing and for the gentle reminder to all of us.


  6. eroderick

    Catching up on my Get Lively blogs this morning…which is an absolutely wonderful way to spend these false dawn hours. The first time I read this I cried and I just did again, although I really had a good laugh again too. This past year I have been given some of the best unexpected gifts of my life and having Aunt Jan at Bugville for the summer was definitely one of them. Thank you for sharing all your positive energy, spirit and story time (from Merrick!) with all of us. We are secretly hoping this may become a new tradition 🙂

  7. There isn’t a moment of Get Lively planning that doesn’t factor in my return to Bugville for next summer… 🙂

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